so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Best friends brother. Beat that.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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