I'm really into asian looking animals
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
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