He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
