I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Randomize
