I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
