he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
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