maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
