just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I wish I only lived at night.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
