You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
