Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
