I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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