Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
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