i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
