So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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