you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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