Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize