that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
