There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
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