Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
