Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
