you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
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