so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Randomize
