Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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