everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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