he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Randomize
