porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
