He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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