Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"