That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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