i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
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