you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
wow bdsm is so cute
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