A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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