its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
