He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
My cat gives me a boner
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
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