I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
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I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
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I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down