You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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