I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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