My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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