He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize