GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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