I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize