Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
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