when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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