Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize