I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
He kissed a someone with a penis
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!