Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Congratulations! We have a period
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
