So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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