Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize