I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize
