ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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