i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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