There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
